| (no subject) |
[Jan. 27th, 2008|12:55 am] |
i could write a million things, but all of it comes off as condescending. i hope that you ARE going out and ARE hooking up and ARE having fun. its all i want for you. so if all these away messages are true, then good for you. i hope you did hook up last night and got the shit fucked out of you; the best sex of your life. i hope they could make you cum gallons. it would only make me happy that you are getting what you want. we put each other thru too much shit and at this point, i feel happy that you are moving on quickly and painlessly.
now, if only you were to read this... |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 23rd, 2007|12:22 pm] |
LOLZ I HAVENT USED THIS IN A WHILE!@~
i should probably check all the friends pages when i get home. bet thered be an interesting vgm post about sarah and how much loves/hates her now. guess im no different!
i dont think neysha "gets it." shes so pulled around by what other people say, but doesnt realize that the only people i tell serious things to are brian, andrew, and skay. and my family, but i dont tell them a lot, really. the old "HE SAID IT TO THIS PERSON SO IT MUST BE TRUE" shit doesnt really apply to me, cause ill say stupid shit just to get a rise or an "oooohh damn" out of people. its fun to do that. i could basically do to her what she tried to do to me, but thatd be a waste of time. i take everything that certain people said about her with a grain of salt. "oh we had the best sex ever? well, thats not what i had heard..." itd all just lead to more drama and more stupidity. i could make a laundry list of the things i know, but does it matter? not really. are any of them true? yeah, probably. does it make a difference in the end? not really.
im not the type to play those dumb games. im also not the type to spend money and time on someone who is pulling that shit. thats why i couldnt stay around her. she wanted me to stay at her house while that shit was being said, fine. but if you say that and we're about to go out and im gonna spend money on you, no. im gonna save my time and frustration and just leave.
i only wish i could scrim more, now. itll keep me busy, cause god knows i dont want to think about how shes gonna try and either A) "get back at me" for something she thinks i did, B) get over me, or C) do to try and make me jealous.
yay for workk yaaaaayyyyy |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 5th, 2007|09:24 am] |
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so much to say, but so little time to type it out... hmmm.. |
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| sigh |
[Apr. 23rd, 2007|10:51 pm] |
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where do i go from here? -_- |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 18th, 2007|03:23 am] |
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i cant fucking staaaaaand having things in front of me because i KNOW im gonna look and i KNOW im gonna find something bad cause i ALWAYS do. its just fucking curiousity, and i fucking hate it. why does it have to be this way? i hope the "i have nothing to hide" excuse wont be used cause ill take her up on the offer for once. siggggghhhhhhh -_- |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 16th, 2007|04:47 am] |
draft with my brother and friends the other night...
lets see if LJ CUT WORKS NOW |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 6th, 2007|04:51 pm] |
first draft happened not too long ago... average team with a little trade room.
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 23rd, 2007|01:56 am] |
danielle and jamie are getting a divorce.
wait, what the hell? |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 15th, 2007|04:02 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  tired | ] |
when im not near her,
im blue... |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 3rd, 2007|02:49 am] |
i never knew my uncle ralph was in the army. or went to julliard... hmm. i wish i would have talked to him about the army. he'd be proud of me, i think.
im nervous about the funeral, im really really dreading seeing my aunt gilda torn up. i really... =/
death makes everyone want to let go of grudges. really, its true even for me. but at the end of the day, what does it matter? 1. most grudges are a two-way thing. and 2. i shouldnt go out of my way to put shit to rest. it doesnt hurt them not seeing me, as much as i dont like to think like that, so why should it hurt me? this isnt just alyssa really, its two others that id like to speak to. but... oh well. maybe when im 65 and have cancer theyll get a call from me. "can we talk." and theyll say yes, cause no one can say no to a guy with cancer. theyd be jerks... lol
gotta joke about it even if it hurts...
but it doesnt...
cause it shouldnt..........
........ =/ |
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| why? |
[Jan. 29th, 2007|04:01 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  blank | ] |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 21st, 2007|01:30 am] |
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im definitely going to fail chem next year, but itll have to play out like this. breathe easy |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 4th, 2007|04:52 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | crushed | ] |
hmm. maybe you wont read anything i post anymore since you deleted your LJ, but maybe you will. i miss you. i tried blocking you so it would be out of sight, out of mind, but it doesnt work. i miss you, and i will for a long time. i hope at some point youll still talk to me again. im still trying to find out what rule #6 is, cause i missed it in the video, but i can tell you that rule #18 doesnt work...
You know that place between sleep and awake, the place where you can still remember dreaming? That's where I'll always love you. That's where I'll be waiting.
ill miss you... |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 10th, 2006|09:27 am] |
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of course youll be allright, you havent cared in a while |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 18th, 2006|06:06 am] |
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hit a deer tonight. well, clipped it really. i think it just hit my tire as it got away. damn deer |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 9th, 2006|12:49 am] |
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im so stupid for not having talked about it. so stupid... at least it wouldnt drive me fucking crazy every time i read something. i fucking hate this. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 18th, 2006|01:52 am] |
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so i dont really kno what to do... im really really confused and i dont really have anyone to talk to... i was typin a big ass thing out but i just dont care to explain. it probably wont make sense anyway. blahhh... i wish it wasnt like this but it has to be.i just hope it all works itself out so i dont have to put vague posts in my LJ like this where no one is gonna understand. -_- i wish i still had my best friend, but he's turned into an addict and doesnt care about anything anymore. then i dont want to bother my other best friends because it wont help to bring my problems to them. UUUUUUGGGGGHHHHH. i need to back to mark. i am gonna go nuts... |
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